True Story Behind “Not My Family: The Monique Smith Story”

Hey there, have you caught “Not My Family: The Monique Smith Story” on Lifetime yet? It’s a gripping film that hooked me right from the start, and I’m excited to share the real-life story behind it with you, courtesy of TV Acute. This movie not only evokes strong emotions but also serves as a poignant reflection on resilience, identity, and the pursuit of truth. Inspired by the life of S. Monique Smith, it follows her remarkable journey of uncovering her past after years of abuse and lies.

The film stars Yaya DaCosta as Monique Smith, who also serves as an executive producer. Directed by Tailiah Breon and written by Sylvia Jones, the movie features a cast including Robert Hamilton III, Solace Kimbro Jones, Kadeem Isaiah, Morgan-Rose Jordan, and Djassi DaCosta Johnson (Yaya’s real-life sister).

True Story Behind Not My Family The Monique Smith Story

True Story Behind Not My Family: The Monique Smith Story

Monique Smith was raised in West Baltimore, Maryland, in an unsafe home. Monique was physically and emotionally abused from an early age by a woman she referred to as her mother. She was also sexually assaulted by several family members, including her mother’s brothers. It’s hard to contemplate, but she’d had experiences that had defined her early years, leaving her feeling like an outsider in her own house. She moved to Florida at the age of 18, seeking a fresh start.

As an adult, Monique realized she lacked basic documentation, such as a birth certificate or Social Security card, which prevented her from pursuing opportunities like joining the Marines, attending college, or securing certain jobs. Her requests for these documents were met with evasion or refusal, raising suspicions about her origins.

Starting over wasn’t easy. Monique struggled, resorting to sex work for a time before becoming a mother. She had worked tirelessly to create a solid life, but nothing seemed right. A nagging question kept arising: why doesn’t she have a birth certificate?

The Shocking Truth Unraveled

In her late 20s, Monique started digging into her identity. She needed her birth certificate to prove her kids were hers legally, but the woman who raised her dodged every request. That’s when Monique reached out to places like the Social Security Administration and the Board of Education. What she found was jaw-dropping: she had multiple Social Security cards, each with a different name and birth year. The pieces started coming together—her “mother” wasn’t her biological mother at all. Monique had been kidnapped as a baby.

Imagine finding out your entire life was based on a falsehood. Monique learned she was taken from New York at just one year old and brought to Baltimore. The woman who raised her had moved to the Bronx for a few years before settling back in Maryland, passing Monique off as her own. Determined to find answers, Monique didn’t sit back. She got to work, contacting everyone she could think of to uncover her true origins.

A Relentless Search for Identity

Monique’s search for her real family was no small feat. She submitted her DNA to missing person databases and genealogy websites, hoping for a match. She reached out to the Salvation Army’s Missing Persons Program and worked with law enforcement. She even contacted the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, where she was assigned Missing Child Number 1201258. Monique wasn’t just looking for answers—she was fighting to reclaim her identity.

She dug through hospital records, adoption files, and anything else she could get her hands on, but early searches led nowhere. Hiring private investigators and attorneys helped, but progress was slow. Still, Monique kept pushing. Her persistence paid off when genetic genealogist CeCe Moore found DNA matches that changed everything. In 2019, Monique reunited with six of her biological sisters. In 2022, at 55, she finally got her birth certificate and learned her real name: Simboli Ruffin. Her biological mother, Margaret Conyers, had passed away years earlier, but finding her sisters gave Monique a sense of belonging she’d never known.

Turning Pain into Purpose

Today, Monique Smith is a proud mother of four and known as “The Longest Living Jane Doe.” She’s turned her hardship into a mission to help others, becoming an advocate for missing and exploited children. In 2013, she founded Known as Monique, a nonprofit that supports families searching for missing loved ones. They offer legal aid, emotional support, and tips on working with police and media. It’s wonderful to see how she’s taken such a painful past and used it to lift others up.

Monique, now around 59 years old, also partners with the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, sharing her story to raise awareness. She speaks at schools, youth programs, and conferences, focusing on empowerment and advocacy. For her, it’s not just about her own justice—it’s about making sure no one else gets lost in the system. Her memoir, I Am the Ancestor: Before I Die, I Must Share My Story, published in 2015, dives deeper into her journey. It’s a raw, honest read that shows her strength and heart.

A Universal Message of Hope

Monique’s story, as portrayed in the film, underscores resilience, self-discovery, and the power of hope. She encourages viewers to “never give up” and to transform trauma into advocacy. The movie aims to shed light on the epidemic of missing children and human trafficking, urging communities to take action through awareness, policy changes, or personal advocacy.

Additional Notes

  • Monique has shared her story publicly since at least 2011, when she published her book I Am The Ancestor. She continues to speak at events and schools, advising survivors to “tell and tell until someone believes you.”
  • The film was shot in Atlanta and is described as a powerful, nuanced portrayal of Monique’s journey, with Yaya DaCosta’s performance receiving praise for its emotional depth.
  • Monique herself has expressed excitement about the project, hoping it inspires others to embrace their truth and understand the complexities of identity and survival.
Watch Not My Family: The Monique Smith Story on Lifetime or stream it on-demand.

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Olivia Wilson
Olivia Wilsonhttps://www.tvacute.com/
Olivia Wilson is the senior news writer for TV Acute. She spends too much money on collectables and is enamored with movies, comics, and television series. She loves binge-watching and can spend hours talking about movies and TV shows. She can immerse herself into a good story no matter the genre or form and only come out from it when she's had her fill. When she's not writing, she's probably cooking or exploring new places. You can follow her daily exploits on Twitter and Facebook.

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